January 30, 2006

Peas in a Pod

It’s not easy looking like a celebrity. I have one of those faces that always remind people of someone else. I get stopped at least once a week by a stranger frantic to tell me who I look like. I stop to talk because after all, I couldn’t disappoint a fan. The conversations usually go something like this:

Crazed Fan (CF): “Hey, do you know who you look like?!?! That girl from Fried Green Tomatoes! You know, the one that died. What’s her name?”

Me: “Mary Louise Parker.”

CF: “Is that her name? Hmm. Oh! Or that girl from Boys on the Side! You know, the one that dies? No, wait, is that the same actress? What IS her name??”

Me: “Mary Louise Parker.”

CF: “Yes! Mary Louise Parker! You look EXACTLY like her!”

CF’s Friend: “No, you know who she looks EXACTLY like? That girl from Princess Diaries! What’s her name?

Me: “Anne Hathaway.”

CF: “Oh, yeah! Anne Hathaway! You look EXACTLY like her!”

I say thank you and that I’m flattered, and I guess in some ways I am. At least these aren't Rosie O'Donnells I'm being compared to. The thing is, it's never kinda/sorta, I'm always told I look EXACTLY like someone else. In my dating years, guys said that stuff all the time. Now, everyone knows any guy you meet in a club is full of s-h-i-t, but I still wonder… how many celebrities can one person look EXACTLY like? Does everyone fool me with flattery or do I have a special chameleon gift? Did we go skinny dipping in the same gene pool or do we all just have brown hair? Anyway, I'm starting to consider a job as a professional body double. So just for fun, let's see which starlet I could "be"...

Oh, if only I could be Sarah McLachlan. American Idol would never knew what hit it! Fortunately, the guy who told me I looked like her never got to hear my singing. Why spoil the illusion?

This princess seems a little high maintanence. Even though she's starring in the biggest gay cowboy film EVER, I'm not dying to hob-nob with this drama queen. That is, unless she were in another film with Heath & Jake. Mmmm... brokeback ranchers...

This is the only picture of Alanis I think looks even a little like me. She's amazing live and I dig Canadians, but I don't think I'd fool anyone sober.

I can't remember who called me Winona - some guy in a bar somewhere. He didn't get far.

When my roomie's cousin told me I looked like Ashley Judd, I swooned. It got scary when he would only call me Ashley, and when he would call just so he could call me Ashley, and when I realized he probably didn't even know my real name. It kind of turned me off, but I still think she's cute.

I don't know something (or anything) about Mary, other than she is always playing a dying lesbian. I could stand in for that role.

Yes, the Virgin Mary. A man once gazed into my eyes and told me I resembled the Blessed Virgin. Apparently he didn't know I was a dying lesbian. Sure fooled him!

So, I'm sure I'm not alone in this. I know at least one person has been told they look like Britney Spears. Anyone else?


Mind Spewer said...

YES! I've been told that I look like Amy Poehler. Oh, wait. Maybe I was told that I act like Amy Poehler. That's kind of disappointing because Amy Poehler is cute and I wouldn't mind being compared to her physically.
Someone once told my hubs that he looked like Frodo Baggins.

Mrs. McDreamy said...

Be careful associating me with Brittany Spears, she has gone down hill very fast and I hope I didn't join her. But yes, my hubbie's friends called me Lucky when we first started dating because they thought I looked like Brittany. I have also gotton, Drew Barrymore. First I was told I looked like her when she was in ET, and I was fine with that because as a child I did look like her, but then I got that when I worked as a waitress and people told me I looked like Drew in Wedding Singer. Whatever, that's fine, but I don't want to hear too much more of that because I know a lot of people that thing she is really ugly and what does that say about me. The other one that I got a lot was that I looked like a blond Natalie Wood (West Side Story). I'll take that one.

All I have to say is you gotta be careful when you tell someone they look like someone famous, because sometimes famous people are ugly. My best friend in high school was told all the time that she looked like Donna from 90210, she never watched the show and when she asked others which one Donna was, they told her that she was the ugly one. It made my friend cry.

Marc said...

Melbo failed to mention that her husband sometimes fuels the fire. If we're in a movie theater and there is an Ann Hathaway movie trailer I always shout out with feigned surprise "Ann Hathaway?!!!!" At Harry Potter a couple of years ago a bunch of kids wanted her autograph.

Mind - I can see Amy Poehler in you... or, more correctly, the Mind Spewer in Amy Poehler.

McDreamy - Brittany in the GOOD pre-K-Fed years of COURSE. She's definitely taken a trailer trash turn. I don't see the Drew Barrymore. She's much bigger boned than you are. As for Brian and Frodo... thanks for making my day.

Mind Spewer said...

Marc--have I ever told you that you remind me of Jon Stewart?
(except for the Jewishness and grey hair part...and the age difference). A young, Mormon, Jon Stewart.

melbo said...

Mind you, Mind, I'm sure Marc takes that as a compliment. And I can totally see the Amy P. We should do a Weekend Update bit when you visit next week!

melbo said...

Ali, the Britney reference is pre-pre pregnancy. Picture MTV music awards, circa 2001. I don't see the Drew, but then I've never seen a pictures of you as a kid.

Marc, Mind is married to K$ not Brian.

Matt Astle said...

When I first met you, Melbo, my reaction was that you reminded me of my sister-in-law. Now I've decided that you do indeed look more like Anne Hathaway than her.

And, for the record, a former roommate of mine is the (young, Mormon) exact doppelganger of Jon Stewart. Even down to the mannerisms.

Marc said...

...and his politics? The thought of you rooming with a liberal makes me smile :)

Matt Astle said...

Why, because of the politics of my current roommate? No, I think "B-Cash" is apolitical. Too busy having fun to worry about things like that. Maybe I'll introduce you one day, Marc, and you can see who looks more like Jon Stewart.

Mind Spewer said...

Well, I don't really think that Marc looks like Jon Stewart, I just wanted to make him feel good. I think he's more like Hasselhoff. David Hasselhoff. A young, slightly less hairy, Mormon Hasselhoff.

BA said...

It is K-$ who looks like Frodo, so lay off Marc.

Gargantus said...

Frodo is a dreamboat, come on! Any man in his right mind would love to be compared to that bundle of charm.