December 29, 2005

Shout Out to My Mom

BTW, blog dreams really DO come true! I got some sweet new sheets for Christmas. No more hoochies on my pillow!

Thanks Ma!

For my birthday I'll write blogs about how Marc hogs the ipod and his laptop, and how a hybrid car would really help me to save the environment.

December 28, 2005

Misery Loves Company

Women have this fixation. Sick female=expectant mother. Who knows where it started, as if women didn't get sick all time from things like rollercoasters, video games and (those damn) Van Damme movies. Women want to see babies-if they're not gushing over their own, their ooing and ahhing over someone elses. They are baby crazy. And if you're like me, childless after 2 years of marriage, you would feel the pressure rising. I can't mention that I feel a little woosy without a flock of hens hovering around, clucking about a bun in the oven. But this post isn't about them, it's about me. I, too, fall victim to the pregnancy preoccupation.

It’s the day after my wedding. We are driving from frigid Salt Lake to sunny LA so we can catch an early morning flight to Hawaii. Shortly into the trip, I start vomiting and shaking like a rabid horse. Hello, where did this come from? Was I carsick? Did I have the flu? Was I PREGNANT? The day after my wedding… is that even possible??? After a long pit stop in Vegas, we came close to missing our flight. I sat doubled over the entire drive and was a complete mess on the way to Maui. A day of resting on the Hawaiian beach brought me back to normal, but I still worried... would we be honeymoon parents? That was definitely not part of the plan. But how could I be sure? What was morning sickness like, anyway? My question was soon answered when I checked my voicemail and learned that much of my family was suffering much like I was. Whether it was bad eats or a sick nephew we may never be sure, but the news was bittersweet. I was sad everyone got sick at my reception, but happy at the same time. I was so, so relieved not to be a honeymoon statistic.

I had another intimate moment with the toilet this morning. More like 6 intimate moments. The last time I threw up was almost 2 years ago to the day. (Our anniversary is Jan 2nd, feel free to congratulate us in blog form.) I was in perfect health yesterday as we flew back from Wisconsin. I never flinched as I ate my Quarter Pounder, fries and most of Marc’s salad. (Writing about it now, however, reminds me of my renewed vow never to eat McDonald’s again). So bowing at the throne today I thought to myself, this isn’t what morning sickness is like, is it? This feeling came completely out of left field. Again, not part of the plan, but could I actually be in the family way? It’s a little much to think about when it’s not on the agenda.

But again, my mom soon called to tell me the extensive list of family members that were also sick. **Stay away from the salami**

And yet again, I was a little glad everyone else was sick, too.

December 18, 2005

Today in Primary

I co-teach 6 year olds in primary. Today we learned about baptism.

Teacher: "When we are baptized, we go completely under the water. So we say we are 'baptized by' what?"

Kid #1: "Inversion!"

Kid #2: "By a virgin?!"

Kid #3: "I'M A VIRGIN!"

Trust me, the live version was classic. Can I please see that on TiVo after I die?
My thoughts? Good for you, Kid. We must be teaching you something right after all.

December 8, 2005

Top Ten Things I Love

Top Ten Things I Love

(or at least that I can think of right now)

  1. Jäger Sleeping
I love him awake, too, but life is a lot easier when he’s sleeping. No standing in the cold waiting for him to pee. No chasing him around the house while pulling wads of Kleenex out of his mouth. No feeding, switching out toys, bribing with treats or cleaning out cages. Just a few bursts of spastic twitching and a loving, cuddly little critter. And peace. Glorious peace.

  1. Redheads
I have this theory that with redheads, only the strong survive. And I love them for it. I’ve fallen in love with Jäger, our sweet little redheaded stepchild. I’ve dated more redheads then you’d probably like to know about. My best friend has red hair. I hope my kids have red hair like my sister’s kids do. But that won't happen if my husband has any control. Which, technically, he doesn’t. Ha!

  1. Being carried to bed
When I was little I used to pretend to fall asleep on the couch so my dad would carry me upstairs. It still works well with the hubbers…

4. Sleeping in Sunday mornings and cuddling with Marc
We don’t have church until 1pm, so we have all of Sunday morning together. It’s our on morning a week to chill, read, have breakfast, or do whatever we want. Heaven!!

5. Sundays in general
I’ve had to work almost every Sunday for over 2 years. I finally got it off, and it has turned into the most marvelous day of the week. I can relax, go to church, take walks, read, etc. I feel sane and centered when I get my Sundays.

  1. Massages
Massage is a beautiful thing. It’s become a staple in my life. So much so that I have to trade with another therapist every other week or it gets ugly. Sometimes I’ll spend the entire 50 min looking down at my clients in envy.

7. Stinky Face Man

Come use our bathroom sometime. My favorite piece of artwork adorns the wall.

8. Lindt truffles (chilled in the fridge)

That says it all.

  1. Cheesy pick up lines
I tend to think of myself as a natural flirt, at least I was in my single days. Back in the day I had all kinds of tricks I’d use to get a guy’s attention. I would win his heart with gems like: “Hey, are you from Jamaica? Cuz JaMakin’ me crazy!” Laugh if you must, but the pick up lines became a way for a reserved girl like me to feign (and eventually gain) confidence in social situations. With men or women, cheesy pickup lines are always fun to laugh about. I still throw them around in moments of lightheartedness.

  1. Crying at the beginning, middle and end of a good book
If you haven’t read Les Miserables yet, read it. It’s beautiful.